Four Common Questions Your Child May Ask During Your Divorce
The termination of a marriage is seldom an easy decision. Oftentimes, the settlement of divorce comes after extensive disputes and disagreements between two parents. While the process is undoubtedly difficult for both parties involved, the situation becomes more complex when a child is involved in the marriage. This is because divorces are emotionally taxing not only for the parents, but the child in the family as well. To mitigate the emotional damage a child may experience due to divorce, communication is crucial. Your child has every right to ask questions about your divorce, so it is in your family’s best interest to be prepared with thought-out answers beforehand.
- Will You Get Back Together?
When dealing with traumatic experiences, it is normal to be in denial of the situation. Thus, many children will stay hopeful and wonder if it is possible for a divorce to be reversed. When your child asks you this question, it is important to stay honest and level-headed with them. While your response may appear to hurt them at first, it is better to be truthful now than to make empty promises that you regret later.
2. Is This My Fault?
When children are unable to fully grasp why a divorce has been decided, they will often resort to blaming themselves. It is common for them to wonder if they did anything bad in specific that led to this outcome. Likewise, they may also wonder if a good deed they do can reverse this outcome. In these situations, it is vital that you assure your child that the divorce is not their fault. To help reduce the guilt your child may feel, make sure to stress that the decision was made because of reasons between the parents, not them.
3. Will You Marry Someone Else?
Children may ask this question in a positive or negative way because they are curious to see if another person is going to enter the picture. If you already have plans with another person, like always, honesty is valued the most. Your child deserves to know the full story early on so there are no unpleasant surprises in the future. If you are unsure of your plans, a vague “I don’t know yet. What are your thoughts on that?” works as well. This way, you are able to stay honest with them while also learning about your child’s opinions as well. Depending on your child’s thoughts on remarriage, you may be met with a strongly supportive or unsupportive response.
4. Why Don’t You Love Mommy/ Daddy Anymore?
Amid a divorce, your child may try to find answers as to why the marriage isn’t working out. When a child asks this question, they are often scared that you will stop loving them as well. The best answer to this question is to assure them that regardless of what happens, you will always love and cherish them. There is no need to go into details of all the faults of your ex spouse. Instead, focus on reassuring the feelings of your child. Remember, even if you are no longer “Husband and Wife” or you will still be “Mom and Dad” – Still family but with new roles.
Searching For a Family Lawyer?
In a difficult time like divorce, an experienced Port St. Lucie family lawyer can help ease your legal burdens. If you are in need of legal guidance, our skilled team at Baginski, Brandt & Brandt can help. To schedule a free consultation with us, please do not hesitate to contact our office at 772-466-0707 today.
Resource:
mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/denial/art-20047926
